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Sunday, 28 August 2011

Mind Spill: What Kind of Heroine Are You?



What Kind of Heroine Are You?

Here comes a time in every girl’s life when she must ask herself the eternal question: What kind of heroine are you?

Would you be the dreaded Too Stupid To Live (TSTL) kind of gal? The type that rushes needlessly into danger when SHE KNOWS she shouldn’t! You know the sort; she runs up the stairs and traps herself in a horror film or rushes to face the bad vampires armed only with her cute new dress and her favourite shade of damsel-in-distress-pink lipstick. Will anyone admit to this if they are?

Or are you the Bad Ass Heroine, do you parade around with only your leather jacket and your wicked-sharp sarcastic wit as protection? Throw pithy come backs in the face of danger and generally just kick ass in you tight tight jeans?

There are others like the Plain Jane, she may possess decidedly average looks, but she is guaranteed to have healthy hair and teeth, an agile mind and fabulous sense of humour, with just a pinch of an inferiority complex thrown in for good measure.

However, before you can even put yourself into one of these and all other heroine categories you can think of, there are a couple of requirement that you must fulfil to be worthy of heroine status. The most important one is your skin, it doesn’t matter what you look like but you must have blindingly clear and soft skin, you can have a few freckles, or in romance-novel speak “golden flake sprinkled on her soft skin by mischievous pixies.” Next we come to smell. You have GOT to have naturally exude some kind off fruity or spicy scent, the saying “sugar and spice and all things nice,” has got to be taken very seriously, if you don’t naturally bear the scent of cinnamon and apples of vanilla and strawberries without the aid of Chanel then I am afraid you are going to get the boot.

Have you gotten past these hurdles? Is your skin as soft as a cashmere? Do you smell as enticing as warm apple pie? If you have then well done! You can now practice heaving your bosom, your witty repartee and chewing your lips sexily (I know, I don’t get it either! You just look like a cow munching grass!) and wait for your hero to come and more importantly make you come, over and over and over and over again!

Of course these are all flagrantly generalized statement and stereotypes of heroines but we all recognize them in one form or another, and I have come to love each one of them. At times they may make me want to pull my hair out, or more satisfyingly their hair out, but what would any kind of romance be without them?

So tell us, what kind of heroine would you be?





9 comments:

Rhianna said...

While I might want to be a different type of heroine I'm a hot tempered Scorpio and therefore fall into the TSTL catagory. LOL Rushing into trouble is a hazard of the personality type. ;)

HighlandHussy said...

Oh Goodness I died laughing!!! My friggin mascara is running!! Lol
Deep breaths. I'm okay.
I Like to think i'd be all badass, but in truth I'd either faint or do something else Gorky like trip while running in flip flops. But hey, I'd have great lip gloss ;)
And by the way, I *do* smell like lavender and sun, thank you very much. Lol

HighlandHussy said...

ARGH!! Dorky, not Gorky or whatever the hell my phone replaced it with. ::headdesk::

Angela said...

That's a hard one I can be all if the above depending on my mood an which novel I'm readig. Lol. But if to choose one. Kick Ass Heroine. :)

Elena said...

I would be considered the " Too Stupid Too Live and Bad Ass Herione" Why? Cause being Bad Ass is what I am BUT! To a certain extent. When and if it comes down to it, put me in a household full of crazed superstitious shite that goes bump in the night, and I'll hide in a closet like a damsel in distress waiting for my Hero to rescue me.... Lol!!

Under the Covers said...

I voted for Badass because it was annoymous but really, let's face it. As Elena and a few of you know, I'm afraid of thunderstorms. Shifters, vampires and the alike? I'd piss my pants. No kidding.

Think I need to hang around Cat and Eve Dallas a bit more before I go face the scary bad guys.

Annie

Elena said...

Rotflmao!!!!!! Annie! You're kickass confession made you a bad ass. Lol!!

Luv ya Girlie!

Myth said...

I think I'm a lil bit of both the Bad Ass and the Plain Jane. If that makes sense. I have both the brains and the kick ass techniques needed to not get killed lol. I do have nice skin and I smell like peaches lol or so I've been told!!!

Lexi said...

Ha what a great blog post!
Guess I would be the seemingly normal girl till circumstances brought out deep hidden talents and I come through the fire like tempered Steele.